Monday, March 2, 2009

One Phone Call from Our Knees

My life always seems to have a soundtrack running in the background. Music is somehow woven into every major event I've ever experienced... and this one is no different.

A little history first... Two summers ago, I lost my dog (who was like my four-legged, furry only child) to lymphoma. I was devastated at the prospect of losing her, but I was able to take her on one last vacation and we enjoyed walking on the beach and playing in the waves before she was too sick to do much of anything. On that trip, I happened to pick up a CD I had been wanting for some time... Mat Kearney's Nothing Left to Lose. As it turns out, Mat became one of my favorite artists as his songs, like Wait and In the Middle, ministered to my heart in one of the darkest times of my life. His was the only music I listened to through my time of depression after I lost her and somehow his lyrics saw me through to the other side where I was able to experience joy again.

Fast-forward to the present... Two days after I got my recent earth-shattering diagnosis of cancer, I happened to get a promotional email for Mat's new album, City of Black and White. I went to the website to check out his new single, Closer to Love, and these were the first words I heard coming through my computer:

She got the call today
One out of the gray
And when the smoke cleared
It took her breath away
She said she didn't believe
It could happen to me
I guess we're all one phone call from our knees
We're gonna get there soon

If every building falls
And all the stars fade
We'll still be singing this song
The one they can't take away
I'm gonna get there soon
She's gonna be there too
Cryin' in her room
Prayin' Lord come through
We're gonna get there soon

Oh it's your light
Oh it's your way
Pull me out of the dark
Just to shoulder the weight
Cryin' out now
From so far away
You pull me closer to love...

How it is that this guy whom I've never met could speak so clearly to my immediate situation I cannot explain apart from the providence of God. There are two key thoughts that struck me to my core when I heard this song. They are as follows:

"I guess we're all one phone call from our knees"
How many days of my life have I spent completely oblivious to how fragile life really is? How few times have I stopped to thank God for all the wondrous little gifts he gives me each day? Far too many... and far too few. Most days we fritter away focused on all the things we think are so vitally important. We get upset about traffic jams, throw temper tantrums over difficult people in our lives, and worry away the hours trying to get that all-important project or issue taken care of. Meanwhile we're ignorant to how very unimportant all those things really are. In one phone call, my life was turned upside-down... and all of a sudden things began to come into sharp perspective. In one phone call, I was driven to my knees. In one phone call, I was rendered helpless to fix my own situation. In one phone call, I came face to face with the reality that only God is in control of my days and my destiny. It may not be a phone call for you. It may be something completely different... but rest assured, it will happen. Some day, you will be faced with the reality of how fragile life is. How will you respond when it happens?

"If every building falls and all the stars fade, we'll still be singing this song - the one they can't take away"
What is your response to difficult situations? Do you complain... get depressed... get angry at God? Do you praise him... look for him to work in new ways? Let's face it - when we're driven to our knees, it can be difficult to be positive. When all of life comes crashing down around us, it can be difficult to look up. Yet, the best posture to take when one is on one's knees is to do exactly that - look up. As a Christian, I am privileged to be able to stand amidst the rubble that is currently my life. I was so thankful to be reminded in this song that no matter how bad things get, I have a song to sing... and no one, nothing can take that away. Psalm 96:1-2 says, "Sing to the Lord a new song; sing to the Lord, all the earth; sing to the Lord, praise his name; proclaim his salvation day after day." The fact is, no matter how bad things get in this life, it's only temporary! I have the promise of eternity with my heavenly Father.. and more than that, I have the promise that God is with me through it all right now. He is still in control and working all things for my good (Romans 8:28). It may not all make sense to me and I may not like some of the turns my life may take, but I still have a song in my heart... one that God put there and no one can take away from me! I have been saved from my sins, taken from death and given life (and a life that I don't deserve at that)! God is at work in and around me! That is a song that even cancer can't take away. Yes, no matter how difficult things may be, we can have a song to sing through it all! So... are you singing?


  1. Heather,
    I love you. God is definitely using you and your situation to help not only you but to help others see how you are leaning on God and trusting in Him more and more. You are right, it's very easy to become depressed or mad at God when He throws something hard our way but God is showing others through you that He is the answer. We love you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Talk to you soon.

  2. You have an amazing outlook on life. Myself and my family will pray for you everyday.

    You also have an amazing way of writing your thoughts.

  3. I have to admit that your post of these lyrics found the one song that I've leaned on for weeks now. But after reading your about your trial's.... Only one song is blasting through my empty,quit room."Pass It On" a hymn from the Babtist world. Please look It up. It only takes a spark......